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    ATTENTION EDITORS: If you are interested in a drawing to run with
this story, please call (312) 321-2031 or 321-2038 from 9 a.m. to 5
p.m. CST weekdays.
    Weekly VIDEO column
    By John Teets
    (c) 1981 Chicago Sun-Times (Field News Service)
    
    Everybody loves a gadget, and I admit an instant addiction that has
just developed. It grew out of last week's column about the strange
videotapes of ''indies,'' independent video producers, but in a
rather indirect way.
    Some weeks ago, I was talking with the indie who put together most
of the TV spots for Chicago Mayor Jane Byrne and former Cook County
State's Attorney Bernard Carey in recent years. He asked me if I
remembered one of Carey's ads about crime rates that featured bar
graphs, in color. Of course I did; the feature was pretty
interesting. What hardware did he use to produce it? He laughed: The
whole thing had been done on a Bally Arcade, a home video game that
the indie had programmed to paint bars across the screen.
    So much for sophisticated machines-but the seed had been planted.
    And last week, while I was thinking about Arcades and Atari video
games, one thing led to another. Before I knew what was happening, I
was typing on a keyboard hooked up to a computer in Columbus, Ohio,
displaying its wonders on a regular television screen-a loaned
mini-computer terminal, spinning the stuff dreams are made of, at
least for a gadget-lover.
    I've mentioned the MicroNET national computer system before; it has
since become one facet of the CompuServe Information Service, a
company offering computer hookups anywhere in the country for any
lucky soul with a home terminal. Besides news and features from the
Columbus Dispatch and the Associated Press, it offers menu plans, NFL
injury statistics, advice on wood stoves, electronic mail (either
from user A to user B, or from user A for systemwide broadcast) and a
few hundred other functions. One plunge into MicroNET and the system
becomes a regular computer, ready to run standard programs or help
you in writing your own.
    All you need is a mini-computer with adequate memory-like an Apple,
a TRS-80, even an Atari with the proper extras. Prices start at $400
or so, but be warned: They can top $2,000 for the biggest home units.
Add a hookup so the computer can tap into phone lines and you're
ready to apply for a pre-arranged password with a computer network.
(CompuServe is one of two emerging leaders in the field; the other is
called The Source, based in McLean, Va., and offering a comparable
but different data base.)
    Fire up the computer, dial the phone, type in the password and,
voila, news, features and computer capabilities.
    And then there are the games-and more games and more games. Hour on
hour I sat in front of the keyboard, alternately struggling through a
Tolkien-esque world of magic words and caves in a game called
Adventure, or shooting down Klingon ships in Star Trek.
    Actually, my Enterprise cruiser suffered more damage than any alien
vessel, and usually the computer tried to humiliate me as well:
''Foolish mortal, you have attempted to venture out of the galaxy
into sub-space. On the third time you try this, the living god, Korp,
will destroy you....'' He (or it or whatever) finally did-in several
successive games.
    Most ended with a rather sad report: ''You have been taken to
Klingon headquarters. If you had a starbase, you would be repatriated
and given a new starship to command. Since you have no starbase, you
will be mercilessly tortured to death by the archfiend Cecil
Dybowski, scourge of the universe....''
    MORE
    
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    x x x ...''
    Adventure was a little kinder. When my time limit was up, the screen
suddenly told me: ''A large cloud of green smoke appears in front of
you. It clears away to reveal a tall wizard, clothed in gray. He
fixes you with a steely glare and declares, 'This adventure has
lasted too long.' With that, he makes a single pass over you with his
hands, and everything around you fades away into gray nothingness....
You scored 0 out of a possible 350, using 50 turns. You are obviously
a rank amateur....''
    True, though, after switching to more conventional games, I won $500
in computer money at blackjack, lost it all on craps and won it back
on blackjack. Unfortunately, none of the computer money applies to
the hookup fee-$5 an hour after 6 p.m. local time, and a rate almost
three times that for business-hours service, when commercial clients
put the heaviest demand on the system. It's all automatically billed
to a bank card, so you needn't note the magnitude of your obsession
till the end of the month. (You can call up an accounting of your
bill at any point, however.)
    Still, the real fun began with a switch into the main computers-on
which users have 126,000 spaces of active memory, for those who know
about such things. It's quite a thrill for a total novice like me to
be told by a computer, in essence, to strap yourself in: ''The next
page will take you into MicroNET,'' the screen says with a tinge of
foreboding-and before you know what has happened, bingo. The commands
aren't quite as plain-English as in the CompuServe mode, but they're
easily understandable after a few minutes' practice, even for a
technical ninny like me.
    The first computer ''job'' was serious stuff, of course. I ran my
biorhythm chart for the first three months of 1981. From what I
learned, I shouldn't even be typing this, judging from the severity
of the first part of the year. ''JAN 19: A critical day, try to avoid
overexertion.... JAN 31: A critical day, decisions may be poor, avoid
physical excess.... FEB 4: Emotional upset possible, take care....''
(I wondered if it was singling me out for abuse, much as the ''rank
amateur'' and ''foolish mortal'' responses had been inserted into the
CompuServe games-but no. I ran a friend's program and learned that,
for him, the month was a computerized string of pearls: ''Your mind
is exceptionally sharp today.... A great day, go get 'em, tiger....
Things should go quite smoothly today....'' I should have it so good.)
    Other programs, of course, will do everything from text editing and
word processing to explanation of program languages, statistical
tabulations, small business applications and exchanges of programs
between users (if both parties consent). Many mini-computers will
perform similar stuff, given the right programming-and that's the big
selling point of MicroNET: You don't have to design the system
yourself; just plug into standard, tested software at a reasonable
hookup charge.
    Yes, indeed, a wondersome gadget. There are only two things blocking
total bliss: the lack of infinite time, and the lack of infinite
money.
    END
    
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